if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
