The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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