you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
