I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
