Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
