Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize