I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
