Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
