he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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