But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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