Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
i believe in u and ur pee
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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