just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
