Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
dude. I can hear the air.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
