Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
