You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
