Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
