It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
