just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize