even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
where are you?
Hypothermia
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
