Umm I'm too high to move.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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