I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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