I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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