I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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