Umm I'm too high to move.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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