It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
