I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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