if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Randomize
