im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Randomize
