OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
