do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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