please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
