But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
