i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
