Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
