we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
