I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
