My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
