it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
