I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
