now i know why i became what i already was.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
