You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Randomize
