I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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