love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
