Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
