On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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