belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
