I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
