careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
