Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
