hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
